Now, never better

Black holes, shaky photos and a word about Trump.

Yet untitled pic, part of upcoming Guilty, My Shelter -series, Mikael Rydenfelt, 2017

I am trying to write this post in a hurry, while in Paris eating long breakfast. While awake at all night long because of a stomach issues. And while sitting eight hours on bus on my way to Amsterdam.

Also, I am not trying to write this post, at all, as I should. I forgot it for months.

What a waste of time!

What is waste of time?

Because, even now, is not a time.

Time is everything. Time is nothing.

Just as it is with anything: if you can’t put a thing on order, it is not a thing. If the thing can put you in order… that’s everything. That is what it is. I mean,

Photograph is the black hole. In time, all comes down to it. To one and to many of them, simultaneously. Like black hole; photograph takes the control. It takes the order. It makes its own. 

Matter is order and control matters. It’s all that matters and in all matter.

Same stands with our doings: they last only when put in the order, when recorded. Whether its done by letters, or by thousand words of one image, or by many pictures... Anyway, if not in particular order, our doings, thoughts and sayings, like all and every matter in time, ends up in black. 

Even, a photograph, in all its telekinetic nature —one that can freeze a time and can control movement (or feelings etc) without contributing— will instantly start moving, towards fading away in time.

All ends to black hole, to nothing.

It’s sad.

Is that why melancholy of existence often labels art? Everything is full of emptiness, and the melancholy, which itself rises and builds up from that emptiness, is then used to cover it. Emptiness of melancholy rising from emptiness, covering emptiness.

Bare emptiness, all and everything. How can everything be so full of nothing? Does that question give answer to the question of how everything can fit in nothing?

Like the nothing in the photograph, where white, the light seen clearest, rises brightest from the total darkness. White from black and vice versa. Make no mistake, you ones opposing analog to digital; bits and pieces is all the same, it’s all same emptiness. 


It’s not the same. Not with the black hole. 

How can everything fit in nothing?

Is order of everything somehow reordered, when fitted to black hole? Or, is there no order at all in black hole, real or else? Is there really, nothing?

How can there be a black hole, when there is no order in it?

All in all; in the very core of everything physical and in the very core of physics itself too, is order. Am I right? Is physics wrong when it comes down to  the matter of order? About the matter of its very own matter?

How can everything fit in nothing?

Or maybe, the question left unanswered, is not yet undoubtedly wrong?

Life is not elementary school and these are not the schools first questions to ask, I guess.

See me; I am not scientist. I cannot withstand uncertainty and that is why I photograph. —As side note, when there is certainty and comfort in my life, I photograph too little. Comfort makes me forget what I love.

Being said that, let me guide you back in time and preach. It makes me feel good; preaching evangel about time, the black sun of photography.

Because, it is the composition of preaching itself, that makes me feel good. Making me feel stable and full of integrity, in middle of violent flow of this all and everything. Still, excluding time.


Because, now is not the time.


Photography tries to control the time, but time controls the photograph. That could be seen in shaky photos too, fight over control. Lost before, now and already in future. Beginning and end is the same.

If it really has to be something, time is, a circle.

In their essence, hours, days, years, frames, they differ from time. Those all and all beyond then and them, are linear in their essence. Human creations. Signs of passion to control. Like passions of Christ, but without reason. Evil substitutes, evil surrogates.

Still, inside these frames and inside these man made gates, time surrounds. Time will always win, it’s an evil fill-in.


But, how come then, that now is not the time? 


As in everything human, in a matter of fact, what wins is the matter of act. It is a way to create order. And yet in the end, there is no order. In the end time wins, as it always does. But then again, it never will.

Because time is not existing, not now, nor was it before and will not ever be.

Time is nothing, it has no matter in it. As time does not exist, it can not be wasted and neither could it past. Yet, time is everything, it is all that matters. And like gods and devils, it is us, who past and waste, all the time.

Now is not the time. It is much more than that. Now, is the time before, current and after. All them, in an instant, existing simultaneously.

That is how everything can fit in nothing.

Time is the biggest nothing and yet now has everything inside itself. It already had that quality before and so it will be also in future.

If you can’t put the thing on order, it is nothing. If the thing can put you in order… it is everything, but simultaneously, closer to nothing.

For now, that’s it.

And so shortly, after few line breaks only, preacher man stands up again. But this time, before opening his mouth, he opens his eyes. He sees nothing.

Good preacher knows also when no one is listening, even when it happens in future. So more it is, as ingress promised. And about Trump, more it is, surely; dear reader, you will surely get the satisfaction. Just later.

In a week or two.

In no-time.